Biblical Worldview: 4th week's DTS journal

My background is a complex mix. My father is an atheist and a humanist who anyway believes that the most effective moral guidelines can be found within the Ten Commandments -specifically, the 5th to 10th Commandments. My mother is a non-practicant Catholic who as a game checked me for ESP when I was a child. One of my uncles is a Cabalist.

When I was ten years old, I had found and read several times a book titled "The Magic of Psychotronic Power", my first book on occultism. I studied and practiced it for fourteen years. I believed its teachings, because I saw them work. I specialized in sciences on high school and went to university to study Biology. I believed equally in evolutionism and in the spiritual world. My parents encouraged me to investigate and to seek knowledge; just for fun, my family and me analyzed natural phenomenons just to know how they came to be. Yeah, we were nerds and proud of it before smart became the new sexy.

See? It's officially true now!

My worldview was a mess. I believed the evolution theories as a fact; actually, I was teached since school that they were a fact. But I also knew that an spiritual world existed, and I interacted with it in a daily basis. I had pacts with several spirits, so I could call them for help in exchange for servitude. It was real for me. I must admit, I felt very proud because I was the only one who knew about that reality. The books I read told me that reality was defined by our beliefs; the human being had the power to affect the creation itself. That was the reason for so different magic paths to work around the world: voodoo, shamanism -my chosen option-, adoration to idols or saints, and so on. Nowadays, whenever someone tells me about "The Secret" books, I just get angry.

... I'm going to start punching you now, quote. I'm not sure when I'll stop.

When I accepted Jesus as my saviour, it all crumbled. It was difficult. It was great. It was true. Suddenly all the logic holes in evolutionary theory became too big to ignore. With prayer, biblical study and Neil T. Anderson books about spiritual freedom, the spirituality that I knew was totally discarded. Some years later, David Yonggi Cho's "The Fourth Dimension" provided me with some context about what had I been doing and how to use that experience for a more focused and biblical-based praying.

I've really enjoyed this week. There's something that we have been seeing a lot, something that I learned from Ken Ham: everyone has a belief system and lives for it. Naturalism is a belief system, and their supporters will argue and defend it because all of their worldview revolves around it. And so do we. There's no "neutral" position. A friend of mine told me about taking my DTS "I don't think that you going to preach your beliefs to other people is any good", so I answered her, "I appreciate your preaching of your beliefs to me". I mean, everyone, all the time, is expressing and transmitting what they believe in!

Even between Christians, we do exactly that. When we decide not to preach the Gospel, that means that we are ashamed of doing it, and that we don't believe it in full, or that we don't love our neighbours enough. I remember a Spurgeon quote; when he was asked about what was his motivation, he said that whenever he looked at people, he saw unsaved souls that would fall into hell if the Gospel wasn't preached to them.

Bible Hard II: With A Worldview.
This time, it's personal

I feel challenged to adopt that kind of love, that radical worldview that moves me to work non-stop to achieve the goals and dreams that Jesus has given me. My goal is starting a ministry called Excellence Club: Global Healthy Life. Its premise was be a family club, with activities for getting the families together and also for age groups, that would teach them how to live better, using speechs on finances, nutrition, sport, and so on, and of course related activities -cook courses, family marathons-, always followind the biblical guidelines. Today I can summarize it all as a club for teaching the biblical worldview to families. It's meant to be an evangelization tool for non-believers, and a biblical insight for believers. I'm really happy of having learned about it all this week, because it's giving me a lot of focus.

Also, my concept of the Kingdom of God has been totally updated. I thought about the Kingdom getting closer as a promise on its way to be fulfilled, and also as a commandment to believers to improve this world as much as I can. Brian told us instead that in God's kingdom, God is the king and lives in our spirits; we are the citizens of the kingdom, and the land of the kingdom are our own lives, where God is sovereign. So, the full kingdom can be found on the church, on every one of us. On me. The kingdom of God it's me. Let me say it again, because it's a revolutionary thought that fortifies my worldview and turns it diamond-like:

THE KINGDOM OF GOD IT'S ME

Totally. Amazing. Week!

"Is that really you, God?" - Report in Sonet and Three Haikus

4 PRINCIPLES FROM "IS THAT REALLY YOU, GOD?"

1- If you trust in having a personal relationship with God, instead of fearing it, you'll be able to have one.

2- To follow God's calling will take you out of your comfort area

3- God's mind is creative for everything: planning, providing, getting a team together, giving you a chance to act...

4- God's first. God is more important than your work to serve Him

"There is nothing wrong with tools. But it's a sad day if the tools supersede the Lord Himself."

Loren Cunningham

IS THAT REALLY YOU, GOD? - Sonet

God lives in my heart and fulfills my spirit
God is my Lord and my heavenly Father
So why shouldn't Him when I claim hear it
and answer to me in intimacy rather?

I can feel his voice, a thunder that's calling
for me, his disciple, to be made useful
To obey is to go, to leave, to be willing
My own comfort must not be but a trifle

I build my own path with my hands, eyes and mind
unable to find a perfect way to achieve
the goals of my God; but the Word does remind
me that my Father's creative to conceive

the ideal form to become His tool;
Not giving Him th'first place would make me a fool



IS THAT REALLY YOU, GOD? - 3 Haikus

Heaven up and down
Talks to spiritual heart
Is that You, God?

Powerful vision
Of a Youth With A Mission
Waves of the Gospel

Loyal obedience
Word of God's disciples
New generations



A PERSONAL REFLEXION

I must confess, it's not my first time reading this book, nor will it be the last (it WAS my first time reading it in English, though). It's simple, and personal, and awesome, inspiring and powerful. In YWAM Madrid they nicknamed it "the YWAMer Bible".

I wouldn't be here taking the DTS without this book. My full family-in-law fell in love with YWAM thanks to it. My parents-in-law are taking their DTS right now in Madrid, even.

Since my first reading, this book impacted my life. I've done my best to incorporate this principles: the closeness and familiarity with God, that doesn't let me be a little bit less amazed at Him; being ready to hear His voice and follow it, and obey against all odds, even when I myself am scared to do so, to risk my financial security, to leave my fiancée for six months and go to another continent; and going on having faith (or sometimes, trying to) on Him giving me the chances and providing me with everything. The last part, having God as my first priority without letting my service to Him to become an idol... I'm prevented against it, but I can't think of one time when it could have happened to me yet. My service to God has not been so much, but I always have focused it into the Lord, instead of into men nor the job itself. But now I'm preparing myself to a deeper service, so it's good to renew and strenghten that decision.

The Grace: the story of the Tax Collector

My beloved and all-powerful God,
you know me. You know I am a sinner. My office is detestable: I am a tax collector for the Roman Empire. Other Jews look down on me because I am a traitor to our people. Bought my job for a small fortune, and change my advantage comes from all that charging more merchants and townspeople throughout Galilee. Now it's too late for me. I got carried away by greed and I can not change what I did. I have sinned against you, my God, I have sinned against my people. I have made sacrifices of repentance, but tomorrow'll go outside, will go to houses and shops. Now, in your temple, for a moment I am free of my many sins, but I can not run away from my own wickedness. Maybe tomorrow not have enough capital to buy the next day's sacrifices. Sins sins are piled on, and now I have to hear, as you gold, my God, like the Pharisee, decent and fair man before you, thanks for not being like me. And he is right to do so.

And I can only hit the chest, and humble, and mourn. I can not do anything for myself, nothing! Oh, my God, I feel helpless, without shelter, without hope. Nothing makes sense to me. Do not come the deliverer? Messiah will not come so often advertised priests when we read the Scriptures? And when he comes, how shall I come before him? I will fear among the enemies of Israel and I will destroy them. I'm not worthy, I'm scum, I'm just a wicked sinner, weak character and trapped by their own mistakes. Oh, my God, have mercy on me!

Do not know how long I've been on your knees. Do not know how I've beaten in the chest, do not know how I cried. I let time pass humiliated in your temple, left at your mercy. And now there is a young man by my side, I think you remember, is the son of a carpenter from Nazareth. A reputable guy, he and his brothers. Wonder why you approach someone like me. And what is so peaceful expression. Beatific. She must be about twenty years, but has the face of an angel, like much younger. He crouches next to me, look me in the eyes with the authority of a man, a priest, and says "Now you may go home justified before God."

I do not remember when I stood up and left the temple. I found it on the way home, walking in a daze, still gaping, and full of peace as he had never known before. Me, justified? Me, a publican, receiving the mercy of God, being so unworthy? I find it hard to understand. As a child, I memorized my scribe the book of Deuteronomy. For the first time in years, I remember the consequences of obedience and disobedience of Israel's covenant with the Lord, just as they were handed down to Moses himself. But he also said that even having come accompanying curses away from God, "when have come upon you all these things, the blessing and the curse which I have set before you, and to mind among all the nations where you Lord thy God hath driven, and you turn to the Lord thy God, and shalt obey his voice according to all that I command thee this day, thou and thy children, with all your heart and with all your soul, then the Lord will restore your captivity, and have compassion upon thee, and will gather you again from all the nations where the Lord your God has scattered ... And thou shalt return and obey the voice of Yahweh, and do all his commandments which I command you today . " (Deuteronomy 30:1-3,8).

It's strange, because it is very different from what the scribes tell us when interpreting the law. They tell us that we must strive to leave our sins, sacrifice and then God will forgive us and we will be free of the curse. But in Scripture, the Lord commanded us to repent and we return to Him, and then we would obey His commandments and make work. I do not understand, but today I received this promise. Do not know why or how, I can not understand it, but today I returned to my house justified.

---

It's him! The young carpenter, Jesus son of Joseph! Since that day in the temple, had barely seen him. Instead, for months only hear about it. They say it was in search of John the Baptist and went to the desert, and from there has become anointed as prophet, speaking in the synagogues as a powerful lawyer. I have wondered many times if he also thought of the book of Deuteronomy when I confirmed that the mercy of God was on me also. And now he's here and preach about the Kingdom of God is at hand. I want to come and join this group of disciples who followed him from all Syria. But I am ashamed.

All around me, people whisper. I have known as a child, he and his parents and siblings. Wonder who is believed to speak well. They call him arrogant. I believe you, I believe in what you are teaching. But I dare not take a step forward. I hear them exclaim "This is the one cast out demons? Blessed this? If I know him since I was a snotty brat! How will he now have become a wise man? He only wants to be seen". I know I'm hearing the voice of the envy and the cowardice. But I'm a coward too. I believe but I have fear, because he promises an unknown blessing, and because what he says is so different from what the scribes I know claim.

---

That's incredible. Two days ago I heard a clamor at the gates of Jerusalem. People cheered the Messiah! I thought "Is it possible? Are you here the liberator?". And then, among the crowds spread palm leaves in its wake, appeared Jesus, riding a donkey. And now, against all that Roman law order without proper judgment to the law of Moses, without witnesses, Jesus has been condemned. I look away, hanging on the cross. I did not dare to say anything, indeed, as his disciples looking, I cried like everyone to be crucified, he was not release him, Bloody but Barabbas. By fear or shame, for I am unworthy. Now I see there and I have a lump in his throat. I dare not go. We are few hours. I feel the need to watch over him in recent times.

Then someone nudges me. They are a group of ragged, unemployed, who seem to enjoy seeing someone humiliated who had dared to shine much. They have been taking turns giving him drink vinegar with a sponge to the end of a reed. Now me tend to me with a smile. I freeze. He looks at me with his crooked smile and unpleasant; see my rich clothes, look at the emblem that identifies me as a collector. Spits and throws a glance at the legionaries; merciful God, I realize how I would enjoy this little guy to denounce me as a follower of Jesus and see how I get arrested and whipped. Hastily, I snatched the cane and approach, trotting and stumbling down the steep hill which is the summit of Golgotha, to the crosses.

As I approach, I hear that one of the crucified next to Jesus takes a breath, choking, because they can barely breathe, and makes a new attempt. His words make me wince: "Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom". But even inspires such faith this man, this poor bastard? I understand that for me to be someone special, for the words to me long ago and that meant so much and gave me so much peace. But this, I have understood that it is a highwayman, murderer and thief?

Slow down, but I kept walking to the foot of the cross of Jesus. Awkwardly, I lift the rod, the vinegar drips down the cane, I spot the sleeves. I do not care, it is urgent that I can be accused, because you could lose everything, my house, my family, my land, and who knows if I also hang a cross to die. He looked up, but Jesus did not seem to see the cane. One eye is completely closed, the blood that is pouring from his forehead, with the crown of thorns placed to torture firmly embedded in his flesh, spilling over the eye and blind. But Jesus is concentrating on something else. I see you're leaning on his feet pierced by a nail enormous; hear his teeth grinding, but even groans in pain. I realize then: breath taking turn. This pain is just to take a breath to say something. He speaks, without force, exhausted, but again, with amazing conviction.

"Truly I tell you, today you will be with me in paradise."

The cane falls from my hand. My eyes fill with tears. This wretched man has cried out to Jesus, and Jesus has promised the same justification as to me. My humiliation is so great that I can not bear it. I flee Golgotha, cries apologizing quiet of my heart. What amazing grace! I can not believe otherwise, really, this man was the Son of God. He was the Messiah. And we've executed.

A young man stops me. See my face contorted. He hugs me like a brother, me with him. His name is Santiago. He tells me, also a disciple of Jesus. I realize you're right, I also heard him speak and I believed in it. In Santiago there are a few others, keeping duel, and remain with them. A few hours later, we announce the death of the Messiah. We grieve, but also sighs relieved that his suffering is finally over.

---

I've run these days of Easter with James and his. I took care of bringing out food and news. They've shared the teachings of Jesus. I was surprised to learn that he also remembered that brief encounter with me, and used it to express God's mercy. To remind us that we are nothing without Him, that our works can never bring us peace of mind, no salvation, no complete forgiveness of sins, but the sincere cry and abandon him. Jesus also said, "If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake, find it. For what shall it profit a man if he gains the whole world, and lose his own soul, or what shall a man give for his soul? ".

I've heard of Simeon the Hermit, who left all that was his and turned away from the world to come to God. But I feel the more I ponder these words of Jesus, which is not to refuse this way that we wanted to share. No, we talked about denying ourselves, our work, our attempts to reach the sky ... and we took our cross. That should carry them to die, that we let die our religious works as Jesus dying for hand over of the religious. And to follow him. I was late to follow, but I think I can follow in his wake, the trail of his teachings. The disciples who were closest to him are suffering much more than me, but I hope that we can recover and honor what the Son of God has brought to Israel, not to be wasted. I will follow Jesus and put myself in his hands. I accept his grace and forgiveness of my sins that comes with it. And for the love that I have, I want to step forward and share this gospel I was taught, in the name of Jesus. But I'm still a coward, I wonder, having died the Master, from whence cometh the power we need, the disciples and me.

Some women who are with us, Mary Magdalene and the other Mary, the sister of Lazarus, have left early this morning to visit the tomb of Jesus. They just came in haste, panting from the race and emotion. And we announce something amazing: they have seen an angel and has told his disciples to meet Jesus in Galilee, for He has risen, and Jesus himself has come before them to confirm that it is true. Death has been defeated. A new grace opens before us that forgiveness is eternal, complete, perfect. I doubt for a moment whether I belong to go, then I smile and abandonment to God's mercy. Of course I also meet with the Master in Galilee.